Menopause causing anger

I believe I am in the first stages of menopause and I am having very difficult time with my mental status, I have had a lot of anger and hatefulness, and a lot of hot flashes. I do not wish to take hormones or anti depression pills. I have feelings of quitting my job and cover my head with a pillow and never move again.


What do you suggest I do about this situation?



Posted by Judy on April 19,2007 at 10:03 PM

Hi Katie,

I just did a websearch on Menopause and Anger and came across your email to this site.  I'm going thru the same thing and have had intense rage and anger for several months and am trying to figure it out.  I'm 53 and just started getting Hot Flashes the past couple months and thought maybe the anger may have something to do with Menopause.  Even though I had a hysterectomy at 44, they left my ovaries, so I really couldn't tell when I was beginning menopause until I began getting the hot flashes this year and extreme mood fluctuations from rage to crying.  

I just got this excellent book by Christine Northrup, M.D. called "The Wisdom of Menopause" for $20.00 at the bookstore. There's a section in the book about Anger Stress and other emotions and Menopause and it makes total sense!  A lot of the Anger we're feeling is very real, but just enhanced right now in midlife by our hormone changes.  It talks about how the anger can motivate us to make changes and confront situations that we've had "simmering" for years.  Just reading this and feeling validated made a big difference to me.  So, I'm beginning to identify exactly what's going on with me and try to manage it.

I Know that often hurt, frustration and disappointment is the underlying cause of anger and rage, so I'm trying to journal what may be the real causes of my anger and try to address that.   I also know that often "anger turned inward can lead to depression".  I've gone thru that also.  And feeling guilty because my emotional mood changes affect my family - I'm trying to break the cycle, but still allow myself some credibility and validation.

I just wanted to share that book with you because just that one chapter has helped so far.  It's not your imagination!!!!  And it's not just the Hormones!!!  It's real!

Take care and hope you're feeling better, Katie.


Posted by Sonia on April 5,2007 at 1:27 AM

I am 40 years old and I think I must be starting to experience the symptoms of menopause. I used to have a strong and active sex drive. I say USED to because over the last several months I could really care less about sex. I feel terrible for my husband and I worry about what impact this is having on my relationship. I just feel blue and unmotivated most of the time. I feel desperate to have "my old self" back!  I have no medical insurance so a doctors visit doesn't seem likely. Please Help!

Posted by Editor on January 3,2007 at 2:12 PM
Please talk to you doctor immediately about how you are feeling. He or she may have suggestions that do not involved medication. There are things you can do to help work out your anxiety and aggression. Exercising works wonders for stress and will help you feel calmer. There are also certain herbs you can take to help balance your hormones and provide relief from hot flashes, such as black cohosh and dong quai.
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