Questions & Answers : menopause symptoms, mood swings

Anger with menopause

Editor — Mon, 16 Apr 2007 19:51:00 GMT

Question:

After being treated for my menopause, I am still going through a very hard time dealing with the same certain time of the month – the days that used to be right before my periods, i.e. PMS. I get very angry. The anger is so bad, I want to hurt people, and then I pray because I am a good person and Christian. I end up crying but the anger returns around the same week each month. I have been to counseling for a year and am on Pemarin 0.65. I dread this time of the month each month. I had a complete hysterectomy in 2001 and thought the symptoms would go away by now. I am a person who is very anxious; my husband walked away from me and my daughter (who was 11) in 2003, which seems to make it even harder. I was told when I was 13 that I would never be able to have children, so she is a blessing from God. Without her, I can honestly tell you I have no clue where I would be right now. But I am wondering why I am still having anger, anger I never experienced before my hysterectomy. All I can think about is how people have hurt me. I want to sometimes just fall off the face of the Earth but I know that is not the solution. My doctor has me on nerve medication because I am so wound up I sometimes do not know which way to turn. I never had any hot flashes until two months ago. When I awoke that night in a soaked bed, I had no idea what was going on. Then two days later it happened again and I realized what it may be. I contacted my gynecologist. He had nothing to say except that I was wrong to think that after having a complete hysterectomy my PMS symptoms would go away. He also said I would feel down and may need a counselor (he did not know I was already seeing one). I hate this time of the month – I go through such sad, awful thoughts about my ex walking out on us. I guess I didn't tell you I am 51 with a 15 year old.

How do I stop this anger? I have tried medications; they have tried me on 11 anti-depressants and my body rejects them. So I wish not to take them unless there is a new miracle one out that could make me want to live through that week – and, as I said, sometimes it hits me a few days here and there throughout the month. What is this that is hitting my body? I hate myself when I get so down and angry. I know I am wrong and I know God is here for me and I try to fight it and have been for three years but I seem to be losing. I need help and I know it, but I cannot do it if I do not know what is causing this to happen to me.

I am blessed to be a Christian and know God is going to always pull me through but I even get mad at people who care about me and I know I am wrong. It seems to have control over me like a drug. Is there any hope for this to stop? Should I not take the premarin and see what happens?

Cheryl

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Answer:

Cheryl, we’re sorry to hear you’re having such a tough time. Your situation sounds complicated, so we’ll limit our comments to a few pieces of advice. First, despite the problems you’ve encountered getting your condition diagnosed, physicians are still your best resource – keep after them to come up with a solution. Also, it sounds like your problem is much bigger than menopause. I understand you’re in counseling. Do you feel that the counseling is helping? If so, stick to it. If not, should you change therapists? Have you been evaluated by a psychiatrist? It’s possible your condition has a psychiatric source and there may be a pharmaceutical solution. One thing is clear: your anger is hurting you and could hurt others. So don’t give up on finding an answer. And start trying to define what can bring you happiness moving forward, instead of looking back at past injuries. You can’t change what has happened, but you can effect what will happen.

Heavy menstrual flow

Editor — Mon, 16 Apr 2007 17:49:00 GMT

Question:

I am 46. I have not had any hot flashes, but I do have mood swings. The last six months or so, my periods have been real heavy. This last month’s period was just as heavy, but 16 days later, I still have a light blood discharge. Is this normal?

Name withheld

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Answer:

It doesn’t sound particularly worrisome. But given that you are experiencing perimenopause, you should go for a checkup with your doctor to discuss steps you can take to ensure your continued health after menopause.

Early Menopause at 23!

Editor — Mon, 16 Apr 2007 16:59:00 GMT

Question:

I went to my gynecologist yesterday because of a lot of things that I felt were not right: mood swings, hot flashes, very tender breasts, lots of anger and frustration over the simplest things, no sex drive, insomnia, and a change in vaginal mucous. After doing a few tests, my doctor told me that I am going through menopause. I am having a really hard time with this since I am only 23 years old. I have two children and my youngest is just six months old tomorrow. I’m still breastfeeding him. My doctor told me that the sooner I wean my son the better it will be for me, due to breastfeeding decreasing estrogen levels. He also put me on Yasmin (bcps). I still have a lot of questions that I want answers to and, of course, did not think to ask them yesterday. I am having a lot of trouble dealing with the fact that I am going through menopause at 23. I am very thankful that I have two children, but I may want more children later. Do I have any chance of having any more children, and why did this happen to me at 23? I am a nurse, so don't be afraid to send anything. I can pretty much figure out a lot, but I guess I am having a lot of emotional problems right now trying to deal with this (I feel even more sorry for my poor husband – we've only been married for four years and most men don't have to go through this for about another 20 years).

Krystin, Florida

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Answer:

That’s a lot to have thrown at you. Whether or not you can have more children depends on where you are in your transition. If you are still in perimenopause, it may be possible. If you’ve passed menopause, it won’t be (although obviously adoption may still be an option). Reaching menopause at such a young age puts your health at risk in a number of ways. The good news is that treatments exist for many of the problems you’ll face. The bad news is that you’ll need far more information than we can give you here. Pick up a book on the subject, and make a “double appointment” with a physician (so you won’t feel hurried as you ask questions). Also, it may be important for you to speak with a counselor about the way you’re feeling, and your husband may benefit from joining you at a session or two.

No symptoms of menopause

Editor — Mon, 16 Apr 2007 16:55:00 GMT

Question:

Are there women that are not bothered with menopause, and don’t go through the hot flashes, mood swings, et cetera? Also, at what age do you go through menopause? I’m 50 and haven’t yet.

Teresa

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Answer:

Yes, there are women who have minimal or no symptoms of perimenopause. And there is no standard age far passing menopause, although 51 is the average.

Severe mood changes

Editor — Mon, 16 Apr 2007 16:50:00 GMT

Question:

I have been on HRT for 27 years. I had a hysterectomy at age 24. They removed all my organs – uterus, tubes, ovaries, etc. I have been taking 1.25 mg of premarin. I have been acting erratically lately: crying for no reason – angry when I’m not crying – and treating my husband terribly. I am just beside myself as I am a very happy-go-lucky type of woman. What on earth is going on with me?

Deb

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Answer:

It’s hard for us to say, Deb. It’s not menopause – you went through that 27 years ago. It’s possible your HRT regimen needs to be changed, or that you are suffering from some other ailment that’s unrelated to hormones or chemical imbalances. Your first step should be to see a physician, and you may need to be referred to a counselor, psychologist or psychiatrist. But don’t get needlessly more upset – there may be an easy fix.